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Oct 15, 2009

New York dog depressed after being left at home again

A Manhattan Dog, who asked that his real name not be used, is seeking psychological counseling after being left at home every day for his whole life.
"I've had it up to here with this tiny apartment" said Eric, a large Canine, "sometimes I just think screw you, and I rip up a few cushions or take a dump in the bedroom, but mostly I just lie on the couch and think about chasing pigs and mounting small dogs".

Eric's owner was unavailable for comment, but his representative said:
" my husband picks up Eric's gigantic turds every night when he gets his walk, what else can he do?"

Eric has been secretly using the computer while the humans are gone, uploading his profile picture to several dating services

Eric says:
"the drinking at home really had to stop, I was going through 24 cans a day. Sometimes when the humans got home I could hardly lift my head"

Since the Toimes interviewed Eric, we were happy to receive a tweet from him announcing his engagement to a younger woman. Let's hope they live happily ever after.

Woof.
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